Sebastian "weirdo nerd" Michaelis (
untiltheend) wrote2037-05-21 10:15 pm
IC Contact

This is Sebastian Michaelis. I am unavailable at present, but please leave a message. Should a response be needed I will reply when time permits me. Please do keep your message brief.

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"Perfectly acceptable. Although I also have a smaller counter-offer, regarding the ledgers. Would the exchange of the contents of merely one or two entries be amenable? As an additional incentive, I'm willing to add a sentence or two of your own choice to your ledger entry, provided it is not strictly untrue."
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May I assume your main interest lies in what is written about yourself and Mr Cho?"
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Since Jedao is more often informal about other wardens, the title is quite pointed.
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"I will offer this for free: last I looked, nothing had been written about yourself or Mr Cho. I would suggest that speaks well of how little you aggravate most inmates. Mr Bright, on the other hand..."
He has so many complaints.
"May I ask why him in particular?"
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"When he pisses people off because he rubs people the wrong way or makes weird assumptions, that's one thing. But the way he spoke to Edwin the other day made me...concerned. If he gets that pushy in private, pressuring inmates when they say clearly they don't want to confide in him, that's something another warden should confront him about."
He huffs out a mirthless laugh.
"And since it so rarely accomplishes anything for wardens to confront one another, we don't do it very often. Not seriously, I mean, versus just snapping at each other. I worry that if it has happened before, inmates might not bother to tell a warden. Especially inmates from the kind of hierarchical power structures who would assume every warden would believe a fellow warden over them. I'd like to know if the ledger contains evidence of that sort of pattern, or if it's just the sort of aggravating things I know about him already."
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"Mm, quite a number of Wardens excel at tactfulness at the most appropriate times, do you not?"
You even though he doesn't count Jedao among the tactless wardens. If the shoe doesn't fit, Jedao won't take offense.
"I would say his entry suggests it has happened before, at least to some extent. Enough so that someone saw the need to advice others to be extremely blunt with him if they wish for him to back off. Very well: I will share his page with you.
Even so... think you truly that anything anyone says will get through to him? He is incredibly daft."
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"I think it's possible. He's been willing to listen to me about some things in the past. I have a responsibility to try."
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Sebastian wasn't even mean about his criticism. Malcolm has no spine.
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He pauses to take a sip of his soda.
"Less so of his self-control, of course."
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"Speaking of which - Hakkai and I also talked about his response to Kikimora's most recent attack. If she ever does anything of the kind again, I want you to know you can also call me."
Delicately, without spilling a single thing - or letting slip how much it hurts to do, as little rills of fire start curling through his bones - Jedao uses a mothpull to lift the coffee table and everything on it smoothly into the air. Then sets it gently back down.
"I will come immediately, provided I'm physically capable of it. I'm happy to float her out of there - or wherever - like a little screaming balloon. To deny her either the capacity or the dignity of violence, and without any recourse to claim she's the victim."
It's completely harmless. But it's also completely helpless, and just a little bit funny. Jedao is certain she would hate it. But if she doesn't want to be gently removed, she shouldn't go bothering people at work after multiple warnings.
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"Thank you, Instructor; I appreciate the offer. But surely you see how my getting another Warden involved would put me in the wrong, quite regardless of Miss Kikimora's actions."
Yes, apparently we're still petulantly doing this.
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So earnest.
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"You might ask Mr Bright? I am sure he would be happy to explain."
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"If you agree with him, you explain it. I'm sure you'd explain it better. If you don't agree, then it doesn't matter."
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"'It does not matter', you say?"
That sounds like something that's very easy to say when you're a warden and not an inmate.
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"Obviously it doesn't. Because Malcolm isn't your warden. He doesn't know what's best for you, and he can't do shit to you if Hakkai doesn't agree, which he won't. He can't fuck with your place in the kitchens. If he's being useful in controlling Kikimora when she's out of line, then it's worth not antagonizing him to preserve that. But if he's not being useful, then incurring his anger means absolutely nothing you value is being lost. Furthermore, in this instance, if Malcolm does object to other wardens interfering with his inmate, that falls on me, not on you. And if he tries to make my actions your problem, you have my word that I will insist he hold me accountable. He can be as wildly unreasonable about you as his heart desires, but just because he's a warden does not mean the power structures here are actually on his side when it comes to doing a damn thing about it."
Then Jedao smiles, a little thin and mean.
"Besides. How can he complain? I'll have helped Kikimora. I can honestly say I've kept her safe and taught her a peaceful, painless lesson about respecting boundaries. We've modeled asking for help and unorthodox problem solving for her, and I've protected her from further damaging her own graduation chances with another one of her petty tantrums. I can be such a bitch about it, Sebastian. Don't take that opportunity away from me."
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"I am certain he could come up with a reason to complain. But... as you say. I will keep your offer in mind."
With doesn't necessarily mean he'll take him up on it: he's still rather married to his no-fighting-back tactic, but he can manage not to be a complete bitch about it. To Jedao, at least.
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"How about this, you passive-aggressively let her maul you as much as she can in the time it takes me to get up five flights of stairs, and then you let me bounce her out like a basketball away from you. I just...I hate the idea of you getting hurt because he can't or won't control her. I would consider it...a favor and an honor, if you would let me protect you."
He really, really wants to. He hasn't spoken to Malcolm yet about Edwin, but Malcolm's got him dead to rights when he calls Jedao a protector. That's what he wants, at least.
"Well, obviously I won't make you promise. Thank you for your consideration."
Moving on.
"Provided no one is in comas or other extenuating barge circumstances, I propose a time period of three days within which to alert one another to any chatter on the respective filters. Is that agreeable?"
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"Extends the offer only to dealing with Miss Kikimora?" It's not a terrible compromise, either way.
"As for the filters... that seeems acceptable to me. To clarify, neither one of us is expected to share private conversations meant only for ourselves?"
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Jedao is willing to float anybody, if it reduces the amount of stabbing everyone has to deal with.
"And that's correct - only the general all-wardens and all-inmates filters will be shared."
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"I can provide a transcript of Mr Bright's ledger page by tomorrow."
Is it stupid of him not to insist on a favour in return for it? Possibly, but then, having Jedao jump through hoops to get Sebastian information he's not very interested in seems like a waste of everyone's time.
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He doesn't quite commit himself to I owe you one - Sebastian could make a lot of hay out of that and would lose all respect for Jedao if he were stupid enough to let it happen. But perhaps if there is something Sebastian wants later, he might call upon the fact that he did do something for Jedao for free, once.
Even if Jedao thinks Sebastian quite enjoys being able to tell on Malcolm.
"Would you like to stay for a game or do you have other pressing business?"
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"I am not currently busy, no."
Sebastian doesn't necessarily enjoy playing games, but he does enjoy the challenge of getting better at them.
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