untiltheend | IC Contact

[Oh.

Sebastian looks with quiet but obvious interest as it just... seemingly opens on its own, and wonders how it works (because he is, deep down, a nerd). But with that said:]

Thank you for having me, sir. [His own bow is formally correct. The room is very aesthetically pleasing, and Sebastian obediently walks inside, sitting down wherever Jedao indicates, hands primly clasp in his lap.]

Thank you for obliging me.

I'm feeling a bit petty and punchy, but I don't wish to overstep in something that is by rights not at all my business. How do you feel about someone slipping a cup of glitter into Malcolm's sock drawer?

[Whatever he expecting, it certainly wasn't... this.]

Ah...

Is this over him not punishing miss Kikimora to your personal satisfaction? [???]

Edited 2023-10-05 16:18 (UTC)

Not at all. I don't know enough about her situation to gauge whether anything punitive, over and above preventing further lashing out, would even accomplish anything useful.

I find Mister Bright...unprofessionally careless and myopic. I've been in the habit of keeping my judgements to myself, as I don't have reason to expect he'd listen to me. However, as Mister Caffrey has pointed out, it is to the detriment of the community when wardens are allowed to take out their personal feelings on inmates with no repercussions, simply because the injury is not more severe. One shouldn't just accept the status quo.

On the other hand, as you were the one most directly offended, your opinion should carry some weight in the situation, certainly moreso than mine.

So. Your thoughts?

Oh! [Well. In that case it makes sense why he'd ask for Sebastian's opinion.] You refer to our latest conversation over the network, then...

[...Actually YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT:]

While I realise it is perfectly human to make assumptions and let one's personal biases colour one's perception of others, that level of unfounded assumptions is, frankly, completely ridiculous. I absolutely cannot see how anyone could have such confidence in their assessment while being so profoundly mistaken.

[Sebastian isn't really hurt by the implication that he lacks feelings/is a sociopath/is an unfit mentor, but the frustration over the whole kitchen situation is... quite clearly bubbling over a little.

...He'll answer the actual question eventually.]

Honestly, I'm not even sure if he believes it. As much as I would hate to follow in his footsteps by making wild assumptions...it seems to me that he was simply angry that other people have, quite fairly, different priorities, and he lashed out at you over it with a clumsy insult.

I can understand his frustration. I know what it's like to care deeply for an inmate that does not endear themselves the ship at large. But it was wrong of him to take that out on you.

One might argue that a person whose job it is to guide others to redemption would ideally have a firmer control of their emotions... but I have been repeatedly told such a thing is a pipe dream.

With that said... thank you, sir. I am unconcerned with Mr Bright's opinion of me, but I am glad to learn not every Warden is completely unreasonable.

[Hrm.] I would not have my name attached to any, ah, incident befalling Mr Bright, but surely it would not kill him to be slightly inconvenienced.

[Translation: PLEASE go for it.]

If his only goal here were to be Miss Kikimora's partisan, I suppose he might be as emotional as he pleases. But as he aspires to a position of some trust, you are entirely within your rights to expect better of him.

[Jedao - who has spent most of his life under interrogation in the guise of therapy - feels that failing to distinguish between a lack of empathy and lack of affect is a criminally clumsy mistake for someone who wants to be taken seriously as a counselor, leaving entirely aside what the standards are or should be for wardens in general. Of course, 'criminally clumsy' is itself a concept grown largely out of the insane levels of competence porn expected of anyone in faction service.]

You may be assured I consider discretion a cardinal virtue. Thank you for sharing your perspective.

[Honestly. Sebastian has like, five emotions, tops and knows nothing about counseling, but even he knows the difference between empathy and emotions.]

I will grant that, when I asked who the most competent counselor on the Barge is, he did readily admit to not being very skilled, so at least he has a modicum of self-awareness. ...Which is rather a low bar for praise, but here we are. [Sigh. Alas!]

While it was hardly necessary on your part, [stupid wardens can do as they please, after all; it's only pretense to act as if inmates have any true say in anything] thank you for asking.

Was that all you needed me for, sir?

Edited 2023-10-06 15:31 (UTC)

That answers all of my questions, yes.

I do separately have a request, regarding forms of address, but I don't want to imply any sort of condition; we can discuss it at another time if you have pressing obligations.

Oh, no, I do have time before my next work shift. [And so he remains seated.]

...Please forgive me for making assumptions, but: should you wish to be addressed casually, I absolutely cannot abide by that where Wardens are concerned.

Oh, certainly not! Your preference for the formal register is entirely reasonable.

However, 'sir' feels somewhat improper to me, as you are not and have never been a soldier under my command. I wonder if it would be an acceptable compromise to refer to me as "Instructor Jedao"? As that was my most recent position and title at Shuos Academy. And somewhat more analogous to the position of warden, I feel.

Jedao-ye would be the equivalent honorific when addressing me directly, although that implies that I'm one of your instructors, not merely an instructor.

[............

A person who understands the value of formality? Who doesn't insist that wardens and inmates are completely equal?

Give him a second.]

...I see your point, yes.

Since I admittedly am not familiar with your world and so would not be able to parse the finer details of proper address, I suppose it depends on how you yourself view wardenhood. While you are not my Warden, have you still a responsibility to guide me towards redemption? Or have you only that obligation to whichever Inmate is assigned to you?

[It's an astute question. Jedao steeples his fingers briefly in thought.]

I believe I have an obligation to the welfare of every inmate, but not necessarily to the education or improvement of every inmate. However, I do also consider myself somewhat invested in your redemption in specific, both because I feel there are at least some things about you that I understand well enough to have some useful guidance to offer, and due to my connection with Cho Hakkai.

Whether you have any interest in listening to my guidance is, of course, a separate matter. I would be honored if you addressed me as Jedao-ye, but not offended at its absence.

Ah, of course. Seeing as Mr Cho will be stuck here until I graduate. [Of course Jedao would be invested in his case.] On that note: my apologies, but as is plain to see, I shall likely be keeping him here for quite some time.

[Since apparently that's something a person can tell over one conversation over the network, MALCOLM.]

Just to clarify: "Jedao-ye" would only be appropriate in direct address?

[Not offended at its absence... Too bad, really. Sebastian likes the option of causing offense by title usage. Now, Jedao isn't as hateable as certain other wardens, but Sebastian's not sure if he wants to go so far as honouring Jedao with his preferred title.]

Edited 2023-10-07 11:55 (UTC)

I'm not betting against you. And I'm a very good gambler.

[Jedao says serenely.]

But I like it here. So please don't feel rushed on my account. Jedao-ye would be...not inappropriate, but definitely weird, if it wasn't direct address. The only honorific that gets used in third person is -zho, because the Hexarchs are everyone's Hexarchs.

[Theoretically.]

Instructor Jedao or Warden Jedao would make more sense for speaking about me, I think.

[Sebastian doesn't comment on Jedao's assessment of his chances of graduation, instead nodding as he quietly considers for a few moments.

There is absolutely nothing encouraging about hearing someone disagree with Malcolm's verdict on him. Shut up.]

...If I may, instructor Jedao: you mentioned "certain things" on which you may have guidance to offer?

["Jedao-ye" has yet to be earned, Sebastian decides.]

It's hard to put some of it into words.

Beyond the matter of the utility of formality from the inside of a hierarchy...I think a lot of people on the barge mistake compassion for ethics. Compassion is one route to seeking ethics, but it's very easy for compassion alone to go awry, if one makes emotional assumptions without knowledge. Deliberate intention, careful attention to detail, logical reasoning - these are also tools for guiding behavior that I suspect come far more naturally to you, and I don't think they should be dismissed. Intentions are wonderful, but execution counts.

Was there something you wanted guidance on at this moment?

[...Also not at all encouraging to hear. Shut up, etc.]

Nothing specific, no. Mr Cho would have me attempt to care more about putting good out into the world, which is straight-forward enough in theory. [If challenging to imagine he'll ever grow to genuinely care about.]

But I am most anxious to graduate as soon as possible, hence I will admit to grasping at whatever advice I am given. [If attending therapy with five different counsellors --> manage to graduate five times as fast??]

But thank you; it is good to know of your willingness to offer advice.

Hmm. You care about doing things well.

Therefore, I imagine a first step toward caring about putting good into the world might be to identify what you believe it would look like, hypothetically, to perform that task well, versus poorly. Perhaps in three to five specific, concrete ways, to avoid an impossibly broad question which all the philosophers of the world have so far died before answering.

[Sebastian has never expressed to Jedao that he cares about doing things well. That it's evident to Jedao nonetheless is very pleasing. His suggestion makes sense, too - Sebastian nods in agreement.]

Reading the writings of human philosophers beating their heads against the same wall over and over again can be... tiring, certainly. Personally I find utilitarianism the more sensible viewpoint rather than, say, Kant's ideas. Although if the idea is for me to lean more into "kindness", consequentialism might be the preferable option.

--Your pardon. Of course I cannot know if these terms mean anything to you. [Different worlds, etc.]

A little - it aligns with my interests, but I've read more deeply among the Greek and Roman philosophers.

How would they apply differently to the choices you in your day-to-day life now?

[If reading them going in circles is tiring, best get out of the circles and onto the road.]

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