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[untiltheend]

This is Sebastian Michaelis. I am unavailable at present, but please leave a message. Should a response be needed I will reply when time permits me. Please do keep your message brief.

Comments

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Oh - no, that's not what I mean. But you're here to change, aren't you?"

Hakkai settles back into the couch, finishing his tea in a single swallow and resting the cup on his knee.

"And it is harder to care when you are not someone who is cared about. Those connections have power."

Selfish or not. It's the reason, in Hakkai's opinion, for wardens having individual assignments in the first place.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

[untiltheend]

Sebastian hums thoughtfully, chin in hand.

"Power, is it... Well. How fortunate for me, then, to have a Warden who has developed such feelings already."

As much as it is rarely a good idea to grow attached to a demon. There's an unspoken approval of the tea-drinking penance in there.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Exactly. Although I will say that making other connections is also powerful. I know you and Johann are close, for example...?"

It may be a bad idea to grow attached to a demon, but Hakkai's not too concerned. He's one himself, after all. Most of his friends are too.

And there's no one who it's safe to be attached to, in the end.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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Sebastian huffs a soft laughs.

"Johann and I understand each other, as one monster to another. I rather doubt there is much capacity for caring from either of our side."

(Sebastian, honey, Johann has outright told Hakkai that he considers you friends.)

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"I think you might be surprised," Hakkai murmurs, setting his teacup back on the table. "But I won't insist on it, of course."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"...Goodness. Mean you to say he considers our arrangement a sincere one now?"

--Well. That'd go some way towards explaining Johann's weird comment recently.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"I wouldn't want to speak for someone else," Hakkai murmurs. "That would have to be a question for him. But I think you do mean something to him, yes.

"What were the terms of your original agreement?"

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Oh, it was a simple quid pro quo: I would let Mr Dorian Gray believe Johann and I were friends, in exchange for him acquiring a weapon for me."

It's been well over a year: no reason to keep it secret any longer. He takes a sip of tea.

"His getting his healing ability back was conditional on him making a friend, you see."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Ah," Hakkai murmurs. Dorian Gray? It has, indeed, been a while. A sliver of a smile curves the corner of his mouth.

"Yes, Sebastian, I think by now the original deal might no longer be the reason he spends time with you."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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Sebastian: 'haha I am so good at reading people'
Also Sebastian: this conversation

"Ah."

Well. He supposes Johann was always more 'human' than 'monster' compared to Sebastian.

"That is good, I suppose, if your judgement is to be trusted."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"I don't know Johann extremely well," Hakkai muses. "But surely, if this were all to maintain a ruse to keep his healing ability, he'd have let it slide when Mr. Gray left the ship."

Faking friendship takes effort, and Johann has not struck him as Sebastian's sort of perfectionist. An unnecessary masquerade Johann found tedious would have been abandoned long since.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Ah, no: what I meant is, 'if your judgement about connections being powerful is to be trusted'. If that is true, then it is convenient that I am truly Johann's friend."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Ah, I see," Hakkai says, with a quicksilver flicker of a smile, and rests his chin on one hand. "Is Johann your friend, Sebastian?"

Connections, after all, are valuable when offered, but much more valuable when formed.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"That is not the sort of question I have ever been asked before."

Hrmm. He makes a serious effort to think it over, at least.

"...Please know that, were it not for his healing abilities, I would have killed him several times over by now."

He's pretty sure friends aren't supposed to do that.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Sparring?"

It's a perfectly reasonable sort of friendship in Hakkai's opinion. After all, when you know someone you care for has extreme healing abilities, you don't have precisely the same kind of concerns about their injuries. His tone is curious, but not in the least judgmental.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Ah, well."

He'll get lectured about this, won't he...

"He will occasionally fight back."

But mostly it's just Sebastian beating him up.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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Well. Hakkai's eyebrows soar for a long moment.

"How does he react when you attack him?"

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"'Attack' is surely making it sound needlessly dramatic; I assure you he always knows what is coming."

He even obediently follows Sebastian to the Enclosure specifically for it.

"And he has known, from our very first encounter, that fighting back expecting to win is quite pointless.

--We are both fine with this arrangement, sir. But you see why a hesitate to call us friends?"

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Yes, that sounds more like a mutually satisfactory sadomasochistic arrangement to me personally," Hakkai muses, not turning a hair. "But, Sebastian, why would you have to follow human patterns for friendship?"

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

[untiltheend]

Sebastian makes a bit of a face-- that's the word Blitz used when he was being weird and gross about Sebastian and Johann. Maybe the word isn't inherently sexual in nature, then. Thank goodness.

"I would not, I suppose. But human patterns are all I am familiar with, however briefly."

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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It certainly can be sexual, but Hakkai's under the impression that it doesn't have to be. Sebastian at least seems like a perfectly ordinary sadist -- though Hakkai is just as pleased not to get into discussing Sebastian's sexual proclivities at any point.

"That's fair enough," he murmurs. "So, then, you have the opportunity to form your own, don't you? Whichever pattern works for you and the person you want to connect with. Should I call it something other than friendship?"

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

[untiltheend]

"I have no preference as to how to refer to it. Humans, too, have slightly differing opinions on how to define 'friendship', I believe? As I recall, Mr Gray defined it as 'people one feels one can complain to'.

Or 'bitch to', as Dorian actually phrased it.

"With all that said... yes, surely, I have every opportunity to form my own patterns."

It's still not without a certain level of skepticism, but.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"Precisely," Hakkai agrees. "Just remember: there's no need to devalue them just because they may not look like other types of friendship you're familiar with. A meaningful connection... is a connection."

He turns his hands palm-up in a tiny shrug.

"Is there anything else you've been thinking about lately?"

Because, otherwise, he thinks he can probably let Sebastian have the rest of his afternoon back.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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Hmm...

"I would not say I have. I have spent the last few days mostly being angry with you, sir."

Oh look, it's an admission of Feelings.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

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"You did make that clear," Hakkai murmurs, glancing up at Sebastian. There is a wry twist to the corner of his mouth.

"But that task wasn't something I could have abandoned. Any more than this is."