IC Contact

[untiltheend]

This is Sebastian Michaelis. I am unavailable at present, but please leave a message. Should a response be needed I will reply when time permits me. Please do keep your message brief.

Comments

Audio

[monsterjohann]

I need a favor.

[And, because he knows how this works:]

I'll owe you.

Re: Audio

[untiltheend]

Oh? How confident, to assume you have anything to offer that I would need.

[His tone is amused, though.]

What can I do for you, then?

[brushoff]

[ yeah, guess who's bothering Sebastian about that EXACT thing he and Johann are talking about? Hint, it's Dorian. ]

Hello Sebastian! Mind if I ask a few questions and bother you for a moment?

[untiltheend]

Good day, Mr Gray.

Not at all. What can I do for you?

forward dated to the 20th

[epistemological]

...apparently, I missed rather a lot.

[ Very very dry. ]

My apologies for leaving you on your own during the flood. I don't think we've spoken before now but I was just checking in to see if you're the sort who actually wants to work on things or if you're the sort who's going to threaten to remove my lungs via my eye-sockets if I so much as breathe in your direction.

Don't mind either way, though I'm much more inclined towards the former. Wasting time around here, while ostensibly harmless, can also result in you ending up in the Void and remaining dead and I generally prefer not to let people go that way.

Usually, I'd offer if you needed anything, but from what I understand, you'd already have taken care of that?

[untiltheend]

Good day... Mr Sims, yes?

Please worry not: I am aware of the [very lacking] level of accountability of temporarily paired Wardens to their Inmates. Fortunately we are all capable adults here. [Don't mind Sebastian: he fully expected to be de-powered and demoted again at the end of this Flood. He's still salty about it.]

And thank you, but I want for nothing. I am, however, most anxious to graduate as soon as possible. I would begin working towards that at your earliest convenience, please. [By which he means: preferably right this second. How dare this useless Warden go and be unconscious and waste five whole days of Sebastian's time.]

[empathicfault]

Hello, Mr. Michaelis? This is Will Graham. Do you remember me from the breach?

[untiltheend]

[Oh. No, go away.]

Naturally, Mr Graham. [Normally he'd follow up with "what can I do for you?" but even for Sebastian that'd feel strange in this context.

Yes? He's very busy being upset over said breach right now.]

[atowncalledtreffy]

Oy, Sebastian.

Jon the Necromancer has opium.

[untiltheend]

[Oh. ...Sebastian doesn't even really want to smoke opium. Or be indebted to Necromancer John of all people. Then again, he's got his Socialising Homework from Mr Sims to consider.]

Well. Certainly you work fast.

[Humans and their determination to get themselves wasted any way they can...]

I shall meet up with you shortly, then?

[atowncalledtreffy]

The Necromancer paired me with someone so fucking catastrophically stupid he's bringing a lance into a cave.

If my warden item starts flashing it means he's dead and I have to resurrect him.

[untiltheend]

Congratulations on your luck as always, sir. [Sebastian is an insane person who regurlarly brings nothing but kitchen utensils to fights, and even he sees why a lance isn't optimal in a cave.]

But duly noted; I shall let you know when it happens. You need not me to tell you how to do your job, of course, but [unsoliced advice incoming:] would that not be a good opportunity to teach a lesson in consequences of one's actions?

[Let the idiot stay dead for a while.]

video, set to shortly after the katydos flood

[undisguised]

Deegan, checking in.

[Using that phrasing on purpose, making a point. But also, his question is genuine:]

How'd you do in the flood?

pointedly text!!

[untiltheend]

[Uuugggh. Baby's first loss of inhibitions event.]

As I have said before, sir, I am always all right.

[Clearly, he's doing amazing.]

several hours after the pairing announcement

[reformedsinner]

[His tone is carefully controlled, but the voice itself is thinner than usual, slightly shaky.]

I apologize for the delay, but I'm not able to meet with you today.

Are you free tomorrow afternoon?

1/2

[untiltheend]

[Normally, Sebastian is quick to reach out to his temporary warden of the month - usually he does so within minutes of the pairings being announced.

This month, he sullenly waits for whatever new useless person he's assigned to to initiate the conversation, as they're bloody well supposed to.

And waits.

And waits.


.....................




Damn this useless system and this useless ship and the useless infernal wardens. Every single one of them is the same. And to think Sebastian at least thought Mr Cho of all people might display a modicum of professionalism and competence--]

text;

[brushoff]

who has two thumbs and bit it in the breach?
This guy
How did u die?

[ because both of them were goddamn idiots. Dorian knows for a fact that Sebastian had to have croaked as well ]

Re: text;

[untiltheend]

[Uuugh, Dorian beat him to initiating contact. Embarrassing. Sebastian would have contacted him the day after the breach, but well... all his energy that day went into making it out of bed for his chat with Hakkai.

Maybe it's just as well. The screen of the communicator isn't as blurry today.]

I was consumed by a dragon.

[So that 'you hurt especially much in the area that was dealt the killing blow' feature of a death toll? Is pretty much everywhere for Sebastian. Joy.]







I realise the common consensus is that no one is responsible for what they did during a breach, but even so, please do not think that person represents me in any way. I apologise for my appalling behaviour.

[Yes, Sebastian, because Dorian Gray definitely judges people for being hedonistic.]

audio

[anti_altruisms]

Hello, Sebastian.

I’m calling to follow up with you about what we discussed before I left - that is, our cats, of course.

Let me know your availability. I know Sekhmet will be quite pleased to see you.

Re: audio

[untiltheend]

[Having just recovered from his first ever death toll, being greeted by this message somehow feels like a reward for no longer being in such a pathetic state...!]

Welcome back, Mr Archer.

Oh, I would be tremendously happy to see her again, too! As would Nyx, most assuredly.

This week I am working every kitchen shift, [please don't tell him he's not allowed to.......] but would between lunch and dinner suit you? Any day is fine.

backdated to immediately after pairings

[reformedsinner]

My cabin or yours? I'll bring tea.

1/2

[untiltheend]

[It's very, very rare that Sebastian is ever shocked into inaction.

In this instance, he spends a good ten seconds staring at his communicator, re-reading the Admiral's message like there's even the slightest chance he misread it the first time.]

after Sebastian kicks Kikimora out of the dining hall

[anti_altruisms]

As Sebastian wraps up his pest control and returns to the kitchen, Archer looks up from his work.

“Thank you for disposing of that nuisance.”

[untiltheend]

[Which takes place here.]

"Of course."

It doesn't occur to him to apologise for potentially overstepping; he did nothing wrong.

"By my estimations a majority of the people have already been served lunch, but of we still need to cook more to be on the safe side.

I will take Mr Shen Wei with me to help clean the atrocious mess out there, and once that is done we will join you and Mr Gamgee in cooking."

Sebastian privately thinks that a person who refuses to wear shoes has rather forfeited the right to complain about getting glass stuck in their feet, but in the interest of not having injured co-workers, Sam probably should sit out on cleaning.
It's not that Archer can't object to this-- despite the curt tone it's meant as a suggested game plan. With that said, Sebastian doesn't expect protests as he's already heading for the cleaning supplies.

[monsterjohann]

[After his attack by Hilbert, Johann does the right thing!

Also, he's contacting Sebastian because clearly Sebastian is his boss.]

I won't make my shift today.

Doctor Hilbert decided to show his inmate side today.

[untiltheend]

[Of course Sebastian is his boss. Who else would it be - Kirei?

But: good boy. Sebastian tiredly rubs his temple before answering.]

Heaven forbid we have a peaceful kitchen shift.

Need you help dealing with him?

[It would, after all, be very inconvenient if Johann's, say, currently being eaten by a plant monster and will therefore be absent from tomorrow's breakfast shift too.]

[deuceoftears]

I'd like to touch base with you about something in person, at your convenience.

[untiltheend]

[...?]

Of course, sir. I am available right now, should it please you?

[It's one of those rare moments when Sebastian isn't at work.]

Where would you prefer to meet?

[audio] a few days after the original conversation

[abrightboy]

Hi, Sebastian. You don't have to respond; I understand if you don't want to talk. I just wanted to apologize for how I spoke to you the other day. It was uncalled for. I won't make excuses for it. It just wasn't acceptable behaviour on anyone's part. I'm sorry. Have a good day.

1/2

[untiltheend]

["It just wasn't acceptable behaviour on anyone's part--" As if SEBASTIAN did anything wrong??

WOW.]

[After the signs flood, before the sword curse]

[deuceoftears]

Hello, Sebastien.

When you have a moment that doesn't impinge on any of your duties, I'd like to revisit the matter we discussed in our last conversation. Would you prefer to meet in person or go over it here?

Re: [After the signs flood, before the sword curse]

[untiltheend]

Oh? Of course, instructor.

I have no preference either way, but if confidentiality is a concern for you, in person would be fine.

[That's why some people don't want to discuss sensitive matters over the network even in a private conversation, right, because it's possible to bypass the privacy setting? That and leaving a paper trail.]

midday October 17th

[reformedsinner]

How are you, Sebastian?

[His voice is mild, a little careful. He's absolutely refusing to admit that he currently feels like he's about to fall over: it's probably magic, which means resting is unlikely to help.]

Re: midday October 17th

[untiltheend]

In my right mind-- as far as I am aware, at least.

[Does Sebastian's voice also sound somewhat weak? No it doesn't, shut up. If you refuse to acknowledge something, that means it's not happening.]

Surely we are not due for another Flood already?

[heyboss]

[Continued from here.]

The degree of kindness when being helpful is in the delivery, I think. But do you not see the benefit of kindness?

[untiltheend]

Oh, no, naturally there is benefit to it. [Sebastian even does the occasional kind thing himself. You know, once or twice in his entire life.]

I make it not part of my personal aesthetics, that is all.

[monsterjohann]

[Somewhat breathlessly, as this could not wait until breakfast:]

Sebastian, I need your fucking help.

[untiltheend]

[And since Sebastian doesn't sleep, the answer comes immediately:]

What now, then? [If it's Hilbert again, they will have Words.]

Late in the Charter Tours port

[reformedsinner]

I've escaped the river and am unharmed. I may be unavailable until the end of the port.

Are you safe?

Re: Late in the Charter Tours port

[untiltheend]

[Sebastian is all the way back in the Eight Precinct, because after he made it out of the River, retrieved some rope and went back in to fish his warden out of the sinkhole, there was no Hakkai to be found. So, presumably, he'd been swept even further downstream, and since Hakkai didn't answer his communicator...]

yes

[It's not a lie. Sebastian's fine.]

[reformedsinner]

[The day after they return from getting Erskine back]

Sebastian, I need to talk to you. When are you available this afternoon?

[untiltheend]

I can meet with you directly after lunch shift is over. Is that all right?

After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

[reformedsinner]

Sebastian?

I'm back.

Re: After he and Jedao return from Saiyukiverse

[untiltheend]

[.........What is this feeling?

(It's surprised relief, Sebastian.)

There's a brief pause before he answers:]

So you survived?

Welcome back. [In kind of a flat tone. He had imagined greeting Hakkai with hostile cheeriness, should Hakkai actually bother to return, but now finds himself not as angry as he thought he'd be.]

[monsterjohann]

After breakfast shift one morning, Johann stays behind, as he always does, to scrub the pans. He waits until he and Sebastian are alone before he speaks.

"Can we do it soon? The party? What else needs to be arranged?"

[untiltheend]

Sebastian pauses in his counter-scrubbing, turning to Johann.

"Of course; it will happen at whatever time you and Lord Leickenbloom wishes it. ...Barring Floods, Ports and Breaches, of course."

He puts down his rag and turns to fully face Johann, since this is important business.

"Unless you wish to do any last-minute tweaks to the menu, that is all finalised. I will make sure all serving staff in attendance knows how to cook all dishes, just in case. Needless to say, I myself have already memorised all recipes. [He'll let Johann handle the majority of the cooking; he's just letting him know he'll Be There if needed.]

If you have no additional notes on the décor as discussed? I will be well setting it all up. I need only a date to give the Wardens in charge."

[golden_ratio]

Are you alright?

[untiltheend]

[...?]

--Well, of course. [Sebastian is always all right. So why--?

Oh.]

Ah, you are asking because of Sir Trevor's network post? It is nothing: just a stab wound and a few bite marks.

[text]

[helluvamess]

[It's a piece of paper that has been taped to Sebastian's door. There's a couple of drawings of horses under the text, a red and white one with black and white horns that is clearly meant to be Blitzø and one that's wearing a suit and is possibly meant to be Sebastian.]

sowwy i stabbed u :(

p.s. dunt tell wardens i did this

p.p.s. i wunt go to kitchen nymoore wen ur thar

Re: [text]

[untiltheend]

[Sebastian is an amazingly talented person who can do nearly anything. Even Sebastian struggles to decipher what this note is even saying. He ends up having to resort to kind of. mentally mouthing the words 'out loud' before he gets it.

Remind him to never again complain about Mey-Rin's spelling. Or Finny's handwriting. And that is NOT the proper usage of P.S. and P.P.S. who even taught this person to write--

...Actually, isn't this, a hand-written note and a drawing, going through a lot of effort for what is surely an insincere apology in order to stave off retaliation from Sebastian's side and look better in the eyes of wardens? Not to mention asking Sebastian not to tell any warden about this is, surely, counter-productive to that goal? ???

Sebastian takes the note inside. Places it on his writing desk and spends several minutes pondering how to respond despite his first instinct being to just send a quick Network text.

In the end, later in the day, an envelope containing a hand-written letter is left outside Blitz's cabin door:]

Thank you for the assurance, Mr Blitz, and for the drawing.

You are of course still welcome in The Dining Hall going forward.

Sincerely,
Sebastian Michaelis

[There's no drawing ): But while Sebastian's handwriting is usually an elegant cursive in that barely-legible style of the 19th Century, for this particular letter he uses block letters, like he did when Mey-Rin and Finny were beginner readers.

And, for lack of a better thing to do with it, instead of throwing Blitz's letter away, it goes into a drawer in Sebastian's writing desk.]